Thanksgivings and other things.

Hello People,

First, I'd like to say a big "happy Thanksgiving" to everyone in the cyberverse. I took some time today to think about what all I'm thankful for. I have a lot. I have friends, family, a job, my youth, opportunity, health, a car, cool electronics, people who love me, etc etc. But it's funny how much of my day in a given day I think about what's not. What I don't have, who I'm not, who isn't in my life, what I don't have. Recently this has led to some real problems for me. I feel like I've gotten myself into a bit of a negative loop and I don't like what's happening.

What's happening? A question one might ask. Well for about the last three days I've been having this tight chesty pain in my chest. Now this would be, and probably should be, cause for alarm in most people. However, there are several reasons I'm not panic stricken right now. 1) I'm young and relatively healthy, 2) I have no family medical history of heart problems, 3) It doesn't really hurt per-se and the pains completely disappear when I do any exercise or anything physically straining, whereas I would think if I had a problem physical exertion would make it worse.

No dear reader, I feel that my pains are psychosomatic. I think I'm having mental and emotional issues and they're manifesting themselves in my body. I'm stressed. Mad stressed. I don't know what's going on in my life. I have no stability and it's getting to me. For awhile I thought it was cool. I thought y'know, I'd travel for awhile, find myself, figure things out. Then when I was ready I'd settle down more and start doing "things". What "things" were I wasn't sure but I knew they'd be awesome and grand. Well right now I'm ready to settle. Really ready. But for the time being I'm stuck in this sort of limbo place. I don't have a place of my own, I live on my friend's couch, and while I do have a job it isn't one that I look forward to. Now, it's not a bad job, just not one that I particularly like.

So anyways, I need to get this chest pain straightened out. It's really bothering me. And if it doesn't go away soon (read: SOON) I'm going to have to break down and go get it looked at. But I have a healthy heart right? I mean I'm 27, I bicycle, do martial arts, and I have a healthy BMI. What could possibly be wrong with it?

I really didn't know where this was gonna go. I had some high hopes for this blog. Though I was gonna talk about all the wonderful things going on that I should be thankful for but as you can see my current state of well-being isn't what it could be and that is occupying a lot of my mental thinkin' time.

Well readers, I'm sorry if this was a downer. I really didn't mean for it to be. I hope everyone had a terrific Thanksgiving and ate lots of wonderful food :)

ATNN