30 Day Challenge: Tag 四

Okay, should make this short as it's late and bedtime-ish.

I came really close, like this close, to dropping out of the play. Not for any real reason. Like, I didn't have some epic falling out with the director. There's no drama between fellow cast members. I was just feeling stressed about having to memorize so many lines in addition to taking on a potential new job at Jubliation (aud- err.. I mean, interview tomorrow!) in addition to the haunted house in addition to stand up in addition to Comedy?. I mean it just feels overwhelming. The good news is that it'll all be over in about 2 months. So I mean really, what am I complaining about? I'm getting to perform. I mean sure it'd be nice to not have to work a regular job in addition to performing, but whatever.

I was thinking today about how I grew up in the middle of nowhere. I mean not exactly, but in the 90's Santa Fe wasn't exactly a big metropolitan area and add to that the fact that we lived a few miles outside of town up on a mountain and it felt like the middle of nowhere. Anyways, growing up there I wasn't exposed to a lot. I got most of my knowledge of the outside world from television, magazine, and video games. I guess you could say I had a pretty unique world view.

In many ways I'm thankful for growing up like I did because it made me who I am today and for the most part I like me. In other ways I'm still kind of bitter about my childhood because I feel like I was denied certain experiences for no good reason.

I mean it's not like we were poor or that my parents were uneducated or that I was being actively shut out from things. But I still can't wrap my mind around why my parents didn't push me to do more extra-curricular things. I asked and asked for music lessons and my step-dad just handed me a guitar and said, "Here, play." I mean, in a certain light that's cool, but again you gotta understand, most of what I knew came from TV. I thought people just stepped out of their houses as fully-formed musicians/actors/comedians. It took me well into my 20's to realize that the finished product took years to make. Comic books didn't flow from some artist's pen fully inked and colored. As a professional you learn to hide mistakes but as a student those mistakes are so crucial to your education. I didn't realize that it was okay to be bad at something. I just sorta figured I'd go from skill to skill until I found something that I was naturally brilliant at and then I'd do that. I didn't realize that you could decide what you wanted to be good at and then go practice it.

Look at Michael Jordan. Sure he's naturally talented, but he also worked hard at it. Not only that but he wanted to play basketball well. There must have been some part of him that, as a child sitting in his backyard shooting baskets for hours on end, must have loved practicing.

It's great to be exposed to the masters of a craft. It can inspire you and they light the paths that we all walk down as we pursue our own journey. However, I feel it can be dangerous if all you see are the finished products. It's so crucially important that when we're young we learn that everyone makes mistakes. That no one (except maybe Mozart) is born able to do these incredible things, we have to learn how. Just like it takes time and constant practice to learn to walk, it's the same with any skill. Learning to draw superheroes is really no different from learning to write the alphabet. We just think it is.

It's all about perception.

Anyways, I know now that to be great takes practice and that there's no shame in being bad at something. Being unskilled, in many ways, is a good thing. I means you have more to learn. There's more new things for you to try and practice at.

Well, it may have taken me 32 years but I'm practicing.

ATNN

Additional: My cat is freaking adorable. I don't know how but I think I got the best cat on the planet. Sorry everybody else, but your cats just aren't as awesome. Maybe in 10+ years another cat can take over as "Best Cat" but for now it's Prometheus.